Words You Hate To Hear

A place to discuss guy stuff, in the material sense. Topics and discussions about cars, computers and gadget electronics and other cool "stuff" guys like.

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Postby Dago » Fri Feb 13, 2009 7:16 pm

Faggot. I consider this in the same realm as the N word.
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Postby Screamer » Fri Feb 13, 2009 8:44 pm

Does anyone still use "values voter"?

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Postby crankycurmudgeon » Fri Feb 13, 2009 11:22 pm

Soccer Mom.

I need a volunteer...

There is no "I" in Team.

We're all part of the family (My reply to this is "Yes, just like the Menendez brothers.")

Customer Service (in a professional office where you have clients and the responsibilities that apply in those circumstances).
Like a bad penny, some things just keep coming back.
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Postby solat » Sat Feb 14, 2009 1:43 am

It's all the same wherever you live.

Snippets of shitspeak from the first page of a 200-page work document I was supposed to have read but consigned to to the "bugger that" basket:

"Aspiring to Excellence"

"Maximising resources"

"Stakeholder input"

"Strong Customer Focus"

"Methodology"

"Key strategic goals"

"Building an enduring culture"

"Positive feedback response"

"Key performance indicators"
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Postby Pazuzu P. Sasquatch » Sat Feb 14, 2009 4:28 am

"The truth hurts!" (always said by someone stupid after he/she says something insulting) That one really makes me want to flatten the person saying it.

"That's just common sense." (always said by someone stupid after expressing an opinion he/she can't justify with anything remotely resembling logic)

And yeah, that "We're all family here." sh*t enrages me, too. First of all, it's only used by management when they're screwing you. (It's never, "Oh, WE'RE going to take a hit this time and help YOU out, because we're family.") And secondly, I already have a family I don't particularly like. I don't need another one. What I need is an income. Here's the deal: I work; you pay me for what I do; we both go home. . . .
When I was driving once, I saw this painted on a bridge: "I don't want the world. I just want your half."
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Postby crankycurmudgeon » Sat Feb 14, 2009 11:27 am

solat wrote:It's all the same wherever you live.

Snippets of shitspeak from the first page of a 200-page work document I was supposed to have read but consigned to to the "bugger that" basket:

"


Indeed. I can't believe that someone put that on the first page. They probably were trying to overload the Bullsh*t indicator alarms and disable them. Thank goodness your alarm appears to be Extra Heavy Duty.
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Postby Tygrrrr » Mon Feb 16, 2009 3:43 pm

Green - what exactly does this mean????? From what I can get it just means that it makes you feel good to use it or own it. Usually overpriced and pollutes just as much or more then "non-green" things

Organic food. Has anyone ever eaten anything that isn't organic???? "Yum, these rocks are tasty! May I have some more please. Pass some more asphalt, it's quite delicious tonight." Also usually way overpriced, and doubtful as to if it's any more nutritious then food that isn't labeled "organic".
Change you can believe in.

Translation - Pocket change is all you'll have left. You can believe in that!
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Postby chidiver » Mon Feb 16, 2009 3:53 pm

“You have the ability to make more money under the new compensation plan.”
Homosexuality is like duck hunting. Interesting only to those who practice it, and for those who want to stop it.
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Postby crankycurmudgeon » Mon Feb 16, 2009 9:29 pm

Tygrrrr wrote:Organic food. Has anyone ever eaten anything that isn't organic????


I think it is a legitimate question whether some fast food is carbon based.

Which brings to mind the anatomical question: where are the McNuggets located on the chicken?
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Postby Cajun » Tue Feb 17, 2009 9:59 am

Tygrrrr wrote:Organic food. Has anyone ever eaten anything that isn't organic????


So this begs the question - if something is "free range", then it must be organic. And if it's organic, then it's good, correct?

So then, free range venison is organic, and natural, and good for you, just like free range chicken....... :wink:
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Postby DeckApe » Tue Feb 17, 2009 12:19 pm

No, "free range" (cringe at the words!) doesn't mean organic; it just means that the chickens are "encouraged" to be out in the open rather than in cages. Myself, I think the chicken can just jump from one side of the cage to the other. It's a chicken. Hooking up a chicken to an EEG would have difficulty generating a test pattern.
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Postby sammyboy » Wed Feb 18, 2009 6:11 pm

chidiver wrote:“You have the ability to make more money under the new compensation plan.”


Right! Meaning "You could possibly make more money if you worked 60 hour weeks like a dog. But the CEO will definitely double his $10 million bonus, even if he runs the company into the ground."
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Postby Tygrrrr » Wed Feb 18, 2009 11:03 pm

crankycurmudgeon wrote:
Tygrrrr wrote:Organic food. Has anyone ever eaten anything that isn't organic????


I think it is a legitimate question whether some fast food is carbon based.

Which brings to mind the anatomical question: where are the McNuggets located on the chicken?


I think McNuggets are made from only roosters. They come from the part that leaves out the M-c-g-g-e part of the word...nuts :lol: :lol:
Change you can believe in.

Translation - Pocket change is all you'll have left. You can believe in that!
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Postby devilnuts » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:42 pm

"Same Difference" I hate when someone uses this phrase in reference to two objects or ideas. There is one difference between them that you are comparing...not two.

Solat? Methodology? But...but...but...that gets used all the time in my work and school. I suppose one could say, "The means by which you obtained your results," but that's just too wordy for us...hehehe ;) :P
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
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Postby charmcitywop » Sun Feb 22, 2009 11:07 pm

Work: "Thanks for the heads up" when you've alrert someone to important info and tweat when used to describing editing a document.

Home: "not tonight".
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But I'm as good once as I ever was

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Postby solat » Mon Feb 23, 2009 1:08 am

devilnuts wrote:Solat? Methodology? But...but...but...that gets used all the time in my work and school


Perfectly legit given your line of work/study.

Not in a human resources preamble - especially when it's used as justification for shedding staff.
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Postby devilnuts » Mon Feb 23, 2009 2:05 am

solat wrote:
devilnuts wrote:Solat? Methodology? But...but...but...that gets used all the time in my work and school


Perfectly legit given your line of work/study.

Not in a human resources preamble - especially when it's used as justification for shedding staff.


LOL...understandable. :wink:
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
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Postby charmcitywop » Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:38 pm

Oh, I have a new one. After only a few weeks at the new job I have already heard "win-win" enough to last me a lifetime.
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

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Postby DeckApe » Mon Feb 23, 2009 11:45 pm

"To improve the company's chances of survival in the economic downturn..." especially if it's on pink paper.
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Postby blackmet » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:14 am

"Emotional Connection"

Everything at my job right now is about making an "emotional connection" with whoever's calling in. Apparently we're not squishy-warm-touchy-feely-enough, especially at my site.

So, now I have to actually pretend to care about our callers emotional well-beings and not "interact on a purely transactional basis." And do it 30 seconds faster on average than I did last year.
We can sit for a while and talk about
The things that bring you down
Like heaven and martini's
And boys that hang around
If if told you my biggest secret
Would you promise me you'd stay?
It isn't what you're thinking
It's simple in a way
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Postby Pazuzu P. Sasquatch » Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:08 am

So. . . you're expected to provide intimate gratification with the overall aim of maximizing cash flow?

There's another word for that, you know. :shock:
When I was driving once, I saw this painted on a bridge: "I don't want the world. I just want your half."
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Postby Earl Butz » Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:43 am

Emotional connection? With an insurance agent? Is your boss retarded?
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Postby Pazuzu P. Sasquatch » Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:54 am

The thought of getting all snowflakes-and-puppy-dogs with my insurance agent kinda creeps me out, frankly.
When I was driving once, I saw this painted on a bridge: "I don't want the world. I just want your half."
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Postby nimby » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:33 pm

"Relationship building".

I don't want any more relationships in my life, let alone from my on line banker, car saleaman, insurance broker, butcher, baker or candlestick maker, or furniture salesman. Just give me my stuff and leave me alone. And for chrissake don't call me on my birthday. I don't know you and don't want to.
"Why do we have asteroids in the hemisphere and hemmorroids in the a$$ ? "
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Postby Cajun » Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:46 pm

charmcitywop wrote:Home: "not tonight".


You'll never hear that from ME, sweetheart :P
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