My ideal relationship startup

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My ideal relationship startup

Postby Ashpenaz » Fri Jan 21, 2011 9:32 am

Here's how I'd like a relationship to begin:

Stage 1: I meet a guy doing what I normally do every day--at the store, getting coffee, whatever. We see each other, one of us strikes up a conversation, we realize there might be an attraction, so we agree to go to coffee.

Stage 2: We go to coffee. We talk, we laugh, we realize we have a lot in common. We agree to go out to dinner and maybe a movie.

Stage 3: We go out to dinner and a movie. More laughing, more talking. We have some kind of connection. Nothing major, maybe a hug and a goodnight kiss.

At this point, we break briefly to make sure all our tests are in order and that we're safe.

Stage 4: We meet at his or my apartment for dinner. We relax and watch a movie. We move in closer, condoms at the ready. We have sex--nice, normal, get-to-know-you sex, without any props or fetishes. Just a nice, pleasant, sexual encounter.

Stage 5: We move on from there. . . .

Why is this considered slow in the gay community? Why can't this happen? Why is everything sex, sex, sex, from the first glance in the grocery line? I would enjoy going through this process--anything faster than this seems really pushy and driven and not about romance. Why are guys who follow this kind of process so hard to find?
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Re: My ideal relationship startup

Postby matinee » Sat Jan 22, 2011 9:38 am

I thought this was the norm? That is how I got my man. Started as a coffee date and went from there. Been together 5 years now :)

I do know a few of all orientations that are FAST. Week one - move in together - week 4 break up. I don't think this is uniquely a gay thing.
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Re: My ideal relationship startup

Postby Xpat » Sun Jan 23, 2011 10:26 am

What is the time frame for all the stages? Technically, you could go through most of the stages in one day. :lol:
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Re: My ideal relationship startup

Postby Ashpenaz » Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:33 pm

One very lo-o-o-ong day. :)

However, why not let the process take a week? What's wrong with putting sex off for a week, you know, just to be sure you like each other?

My new motto for gay relationships: Start with Coffee Instead of Sex!
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Re: My ideal relationship startup

Postby Davy » Sun Apr 10, 2011 3:12 pm

Just about every relationship I have ever had follows that formula. It's just a matter of looking in the right places for the right guy. As far as time-frames go, I read somewhere that it takes an average of 7 hours spent together continuously to be comfortable enough to have sex.
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