Detecting Flirting

Talk about romance and dating, or lack there of.

Moderators: selective_soldier, olywaguy, solat

Detecting Flirting

Postby foxeyes2 » Tue Aug 09, 2005 3:51 pm

So how can you tell if someone is flirting with you? The other day I was hanging out with this guy and I thought for a second or two he was flirting with me. I know I was just as shocked as you are. I thought about it some more and am unsure if he was or not. So how can you tell when it is not too obvious? I would like to know in the off chance it happens again.
We are all one tribe. We are all one people.
Reduce Reuse Recycle
foxeyes2
Moderator
 
Posts: 829
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 6:51 am
Location: Nashville, TN

Postby RedRage00 » Tue Aug 09, 2005 4:07 pm

I'm usually the one doing the flirting :wink: :lol:
User avatar
RedRage00
Member
 
Posts: 396
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 1:16 am
Location: Dallas, Tx

Postby ditchdigger » Tue Aug 09, 2005 4:20 pm

I will have to agree that it is easy to know if Joe is flirting. If he unzips your pants, that is pretty much a given then he is flirting! HA HA HA...love ya li'l Joe! Big ol' Smooch!
ditchdigger
Newbie
 
Posts: 33
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 11:03 pm
Location: N. Indiana

Postby RedRage00 » Tue Aug 09, 2005 4:47 pm

ditchdigger wrote:I will have to agree that it is easy to know if Joe is flirting. If he unzips your pants, that is pretty much a given then he is flirting! HA HA HA...love ya li'l Joe! Big ol' Smooch!



hahahaha...don't be givin' away my secrets ;)

RR
User avatar
RedRage00
Member
 
Posts: 396
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 1:16 am
Location: Dallas, Tx

Postby dabonsteed » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:07 pm

I usually wait until my friends say "hey, who was that guy flrting with you?" or "You know that _____ has a big old crush on you, right?"

Otherwise I cannot tell.
"this is your life, are you who you want to be?"
Switchfoot
dabonsteed
Member
 
Posts: 76
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 10:32 pm
Location: Chicago

Postby devilnuts » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:08 pm

This I've noticed dabon...heheeh :P
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby Xaphan » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:11 pm

I’m with dabon on this one. I don’t know until someone says something or it’s so obvious I could file sexual harassment charges, haha.
Living in the desert.
User avatar
Xaphan
Member
 
Posts: 81
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 10:10 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby Endobrian » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:19 pm

same....it goes right over his head.


devilnuts wrote:This I've noticed dabon...heheeh :P
---------------------------
War over there, is peace over here. Freedom of speech and of the press, binds us.
What we arn't told, is strength.

'84.
User avatar
Endobrian
Member
 
Posts: 179
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 12:48 am
Location: San Diego

Postby dabonsteed » Tue Aug 09, 2005 5:24 pm

what goes over my head?
"this is your life, are you who you want to be?"
Switchfoot
dabonsteed
Member
 
Posts: 76
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 10:32 pm
Location: Chicago

Postby devilnuts » Tue Aug 09, 2005 6:24 pm

Any flirting anyone does with you. I've seen several guys hitting on you and you don't acknowledge any of them.

And Xaphan is the same way...I almost got served papers a couple months ago...hehehe.
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby dabonsteed » Tue Aug 09, 2005 6:29 pm

I just assume everyone on here is being nice, nothing more.

Since everyone lives so far away from me, I don't see the point in flirting in any sort of serious way back (when I have noticed it). Plus I've been accused of being a "tease" enough times that I don't really flirt with anyone much anymore.
"this is your life, are you who you want to be?"
Switchfoot
dabonsteed
Member
 
Posts: 76
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 10:32 pm
Location: Chicago

Postby devilnuts » Tue Aug 09, 2005 6:34 pm

Yes, well, Brian's idea of being friendly might differ from your idea of friendly. Be careful when you go out to LA...he will have to beat you over the head and drag you back to his place if you don't pick up on his flirting...hehehe
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby RedRage00 » Tue Aug 09, 2005 9:09 pm

dabonsteed wrote:I just assume everyone on here is being nice, nothing more.

Since everyone lives so far away from me, I don't see the point in flirting in any sort of serious way back (when I have noticed it). Plus I've been accused of being a "tease" enough times that I don't really flirt with anyone much anymore.


I'm called a tease all the time, but I still love flirting ;)

Joe
User avatar
RedRage00
Member
 
Posts: 396
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 1:16 am
Location: Dallas, Tx

Postby blackmet » Tue Aug 09, 2005 9:19 pm

Huh? What? Flirting? What? With me? Really?

Wow. Nobody does THAT.

Seriously, unless you're so obvious it's unbelievable, I never notice.
We can sit for a while and talk about
The things that bring you down
Like heaven and martini's
And boys that hang around
If if told you my biggest secret
Would you promise me you'd stay?
It isn't what you're thinking
It's simple in a way
User avatar
blackmet
Member
 
Posts: 308
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 3:24 am
Location: Wheat Ridge, Co.

Postby devilnuts » Tue Aug 09, 2005 9:32 pm

blackmet wrote:Huh? What? Flirting? What? With me? Really?

Wow. Nobody does THAT.

Seriously, unless you're so obvious it's unbelievable, I never notice.


Yes, you are another one that needs to be beat over the head. Sheesh...while we are at it, let's add Frosty to that list. I think Beamer and BostonGuy could be added. I don't know if TomSA doesn't get it (unless it's really obvious) or if he is just a little shy. I think he is just a little shy when it comes to that.

I know several guys that AREN'T shy about flirting...Too many to list...where is that pic from Vegas...EHEHEHEHEHEHEHE :lol: There was so much flirting going on during that trip...ehhehe. It was all good though.
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby Endobrian » Tue Aug 09, 2005 9:33 pm

kieth, you are telling me no one hits up on you while you are working?

I find that very hard to believe.

any of these?:

"nice watch"
"nice smile"
"what console do you use at home?"
"what do you think?"
"what bands do you like?"
"ah, i love that movie, have you seen it?"

nothing?
---------------------------
War over there, is peace over here. Freedom of speech and of the press, binds us.
What we arn't told, is strength.

'84.
User avatar
Endobrian
Member
 
Posts: 179
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 12:48 am
Location: San Diego

Postby devilnuts » Tue Aug 09, 2005 9:36 pm

Endobrian wrote:kieth, you are telling me no one hits up on you while you are working?

I find that very hard to believe.

any of these?:

"nice watch"
"nice smile"
"what console do you use at home?"
"what do you think?"
"what bands do you like?"
"ah, i love that movie, have you seen it?"

nothing?


LMAO :lol: Brian...that is pretty vague. But I've said some to him that were a little more pointed...all to no avail :(
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby Beamer » Tue Aug 09, 2005 10:09 pm

It's weird... People have always flirted with me on-line. Women flirt with me off-line... like in bars, restaurants, etc. I went out to dinner Saturday night and thought the hostess was going to sit in my lap. But guys? There have only been a few times that I can think of when I actually felt a guy was flirting with me. I don't give off any signs that I'm into guys so I guess that would be the problem. A lot of guys are intimidated by another guy who isn't obviously gay and as a result, they don't try to show any signs of interest. I know this because I feel the same way. I am friendly and try to spark up conversations with both women and men. But with the guys, I very rarely get any feedback that they might be interested in more than just conversation and getting to know me as a friend. That's why I've tried to do the on-line thing with some of the more reputable internet dating sites. Because doing it in the real world has been close to impossible for me. Not that the internet has proven to be much more than "close to impossible" :roll:
Beamer
Member
 
Posts: 98
Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2004 7:52 pm

Postby dabonsteed » Tue Aug 09, 2005 10:24 pm

you guys'll get a kick out of these two:

So this weekend I'm at a bar and out of nowhere I feel someone touch my right arm. I look over to the crowd of guys standing next to me and the guy farthest from me is the one reaching across his friends to offer me something in his hands.



Now keep in mind I had just had a run in with one of my Exes that didn't go so well so I was a bit disoriented from that.




Anyway this guy is pointing to stuff in his hand and at first it looked like drugs, but then I realized that it was gum and immediately said, "Oh, no thanks, I don't need any gum." and turned around to my friend. In my head, when I saw the gum I thought "Do I know him? Why's he offering me gum? Is he trying to say I have bad breath? Maybe he's drunk and thinks I'm just one of his friends?" and that's why I so quickly dismissed his offer, because it struck me as odd.

About 20 minutes later I realized he was probably trying to flirt with me. He was alright looking but with the big "ABERCROMBIE" logo on his chest I lost interest, and lost even more interest when he and his friends started getting obnoxious. Keep in mind they're standing right next to me. At some point on my way to the bathroom or back, I bumped Gum Guy with my elbow. When I turned to him and said "Oh, I'm so sorry" he gave me this look like I had bitchslapped his mother. He must've been pissed from the gum incident.






Additionally, my friend D told me yesterday that this friend of hers has a crush on me and has had one for several months. When I realized who she was talking about I thought "so that's why Steve's so nice to me, going out of his way to say Hi to me whenever we're in the same place."

In my own defense though, he has never made a move of any kind other than to say hello. Additionally, D has several gay male friends who are all either Mark, Rick, or Steve (not really, but I like keeping anonymity) Some ten friends of hers all named either Mark, Rick, or Steve. It was hard to keep track of who is who. I knew someone named Steve had a boyfriend, and somewhere along the way got the impression that the Steve who always says "Hi" to me(and is really cute) is the one with a boyfriend. He's not, he's single.
I don't bother with people who are already taken, so I was always nice to Steve, I just didn't do or say much to him because, I don't think we were ever in a situation where we could talk. I know I was never alone with him. So it's funny, because the reason he's showed up the last times I've hung out with D is because he knew I'd be there. Although we never talked. Also funny that this whole time we both thought the other was cute only for one reason or another nobody's made any sort of move.

Of course now, I don't know when I'll see him next. When I do, I can't suddenly be all nice and super interested in him because then he'll know that D said something to me. So I have no idea what to do, but I'm sorta excited.
"this is your life, are you who you want to be?"
Switchfoot
dabonsteed
Member
 
Posts: 76
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2004 10:32 pm
Location: Chicago

Postby Justtopost » Tue Aug 09, 2005 11:18 pm

I am one of those who are very bad at detecting flirting, even if it is VERY obvious to everyone else.

In highschool there was this one particularly upfront girl and her friend who liked to play "grab ass" and occasionally "grab front". I thought they were just being overly friendly lol.

It took someone else explaining that those girls liked me for me to understand.

There have been a few instances where I knew someone was flirting with me, but most of the time it was after the fact.

Por ejemplo, an acquaintance in highschool called me out of the blue one day and asked me if I wanted if I wanted to go out and eat at some restaurant with him, I remember thinking "how weird, I wonder why he would think we are good enough friends to just go eat somewhere together". Much later (like a year) I realized that he was asking me out lol.

There have also been a few times where people I dont know, like out in public, have been overly friendly/helpful, and at the time all I can think is "what a weirdo" then it dawns on me way later.

Kind of wish I could catch on to it at the time but hindsight 20/20.
User avatar
Justtopost
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 14, 2004 10:10 pm
Location: Central Texas

Postby blackmet » Wed Aug 10, 2005 12:46 am

Endobrian wrote:kieth, you are telling me no one hits up on you while you are working?

I find that very hard to believe.

any of these?:

"nice watch"
"nice smile"
"what console do you use at home?"
"what do you think?"
"what bands do you like?"
"ah, i love that movie, have you seen it?"

nothing?


No, not really. Except for "Nice Watch," which tends to be from cart attendants while I'm on a smoke break. Even if that counts as flirting, I'd prefer for it not to. :lol:

Oh, wait, there was this one really creepy time...I was at dinner with my friend Wendy at Chili's on a Saturday night. Some clearly gay guy was there with his two fag-hags, and he bummed a smoke from me. The NEXT DAY, I saw him hanging around Electronics at my work near the end of my shift. He was using the phone to call someone and have a conversation. The closing boat guy came in, I told him what was going on, and he responded by going over there and kicking the guy off the phone.

Yes, I MIGHT get flirted with more than I know...but either I don't notice it or don't have a comeback, so it's all for naught. :cry: And my flirting skills just ain't very sharp in any case.
We can sit for a while and talk about
The things that bring you down
Like heaven and martini's
And boys that hang around
If if told you my biggest secret
Would you promise me you'd stay?
It isn't what you're thinking
It's simple in a way
User avatar
blackmet
Member
 
Posts: 308
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 3:24 am
Location: Wheat Ridge, Co.

Postby Endobrian » Wed Aug 10, 2005 1:13 am

You know, you really should be bedding the cute cart attendants. :wink:
---------------------------
War over there, is peace over here. Freedom of speech and of the press, binds us.
What we arn't told, is strength.

'84.
User avatar
Endobrian
Member
 
Posts: 179
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 12:48 am
Location: San Diego

Postby devilnuts » Wed Aug 10, 2005 1:16 am

Endobrian wrote:You know, you really should be bedding the cute cart attendants. :wink:


AHEM!!! I was in line first...waaaaaaaaaay before there were any of those...lmao.
Supporting the troops shouldn't stop at the battlefield.
User avatar
devilnuts
Moderator
 
Posts: 1367
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 3:01 pm
Location: Tucson, AZ

Postby FuzzyScorpio » Wed Aug 10, 2005 2:52 am

ONE time, recently, someone on another forum in which I participate saw a picture of me taken at an event, and wanted to know who is that gorgeous man. It was rather uncomfortable, because this guy obviously is either VERY desperate or has VERY bad taste. He's 'round the other side of planet anyway, and I wrote-off the incident as a misunderstanding.
I *do not* understand what you are talking about, so I'm hanging up now.
FuzzyScorpio
Member
 
Posts: 118
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 3:53 am

Postby Endobrian » Wed Aug 10, 2005 2:58 am

now i have heard everything. Last time you posted your pic, half the guys here was fawning all over it. :)

FuzzyScorpio wrote:ONE time, recently, someone on another forum in which I participate saw a picture of me taken at an event, and wanted to know who is that gorgeous man. It was rather uncomfortable, because this guy obviously is either VERY desperate or has VERY bad taste. He's 'round the other side of planet anyway, and I wrote-off the incident as a misunderstanding.
---------------------------
War over there, is peace over here. Freedom of speech and of the press, binds us.
What we arn't told, is strength.

'84.
User avatar
Endobrian
Member
 
Posts: 179
Joined: Sun Oct 10, 2004 12:48 am
Location: San Diego

Next

Return to Dating, Commitment and Romance

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron