Have you ever meet some guy you thought was so straight...

Discussion on what it means to be straight acting, whether it's good, bad or indifferent.

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Have you ever been mistaked as straight?

Poll ended at Fri Jul 13, 2007 5:50 pm

yes
10
100%
no
0
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Total votes : 10

Have you ever meet some guy you thought was so straight...

Postby carl » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:50 pm

looking and acting you could hardly believe he was gay?
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Postby Westwood » Tue Jul 03, 2007 5:58 pm

Actually in this part of Arkansas, most gay men we know would be mistaken for straight.
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Postby furface » Tue Jul 03, 2007 8:07 pm

Frequently. On more than one occasion bartenders have whispered to me Ya know this is a gay bar, don't ya?
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hell yea

Postby Social_Hell » Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:58 pm

Even if I find a guy who wants sex he swears I am straight and a basher. Sometimes it sucks.
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Postby Guinness Fan » Fri Aug 24, 2007 8:42 pm

Happens to me all the time...I'm very straight acting & looking...
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Postby gvtire » Sat Aug 25, 2007 10:25 am

Like the others it happens all of the time, and it's frustrating.
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Postby qwertz » Sat Aug 25, 2007 4:03 pm

Almost all gay guys are so str8 in their behaviour no one ever would believe they are gay. They don't act at all. On the contrary. I am not talking about bisexual guys, but about guys attracted to guys only. The image of guys attracted to guys only, as it exists in society, is a total delusion, but society needs it as it makes "outing" necessary and, as long as you have to out yourself, the false image can be maintained there is something fishy about it, while society has the duty to avoid to deform the youth from the very beginning and provide the youth with correct images and not with delusions.
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Postby Social_Hell » Sat Aug 25, 2007 5:02 pm

qwertz wrote:Almost all gay guys are so str8 in their behaviour no one ever would believe they are gay. They don't act at all. On the contrary. I am not talking about bisexual guys, but about guys attracted to guys only. The image of guys attracted to guys only, as it exists in society, is a total delusion, but society needs it as it makes "outing" necessary and, as long as you have to out yourself, the false image can be maintained there is something fishy about it, while society has the duty to avoid to deform the youth from the very beginning and provide the youth with correct images and not with delusions.



Um WHAT!??

Please give me a break! I have seen so many flamers it's ridiulous, there guys are so out, theirflamer persona arives 15 minutes before they do. Thats the problem, we only see the flamers who have this NEED to out-gay each other. Its not the fault of normal gay men who act with DIGNITY and self respect, its the fault of the Flamers who make society uncomfortable with the 24/7 gay drama. These IDIOTS can't buy a loaf of bread with out a GAY DRAMA incident. They have made society sick of gayness. Because all society see's is GAY Drama queens. This int an arguement for normal men who happen to be gay to be outed, instead its a serious arguement for flamers to quit overacting and creating drama, they are the problem. I am old enough to remember when people didn't give a crap if someone was gay or not, so long as you acted with self respect and Dignity. I lived next door to the Chief of Police who was known to not be gay friendly, we lived on the lake as you know lake lots are tiny so we lived (CLOSE), he had a young 16 year old boy and had no problem with me and my lover who lived ther already 4 years, why??? simple, it was obvious we were mates if you lived that close that long, but me and Rick had dignity, acted like any normal man, and had enough self respect to not be *$#*@# on the docks or backyard, or any other outragious behavior I have personally witnessed by gay men. Discusting displays of gross indecency, not PDA.

Sorry man but you speak in circles. this is your quote maybe say it in english and quit trying to sound lofty and intellectual. I have a IQ of 169 and I can speak regular english and I don't make such a bad attempt at sounding intellectual.
You said..... The image of guys attracted to guys only, as it exists in society, is a total delusion, but society needs it as it makes "outing" necessary and, as long as you have to out yourself, the false image can be maintained there is something fishy about it, while society has the duty to avoid to deform the youth from the very beginning and provide the youth with correct images and not with delusions.......................

Take remedial english again please.

There is and never has been any reason for outing, outing is a self serving act of terrorism. Yes I said TERRORISM! Its a violent act by it's very nature, it places people in dire peril, and many times in financial peril from loss of jobs, and violence form bashers. Anyone who outs someone should face total isolation from self respecting gay men. It is Terrorism. No gay human being has ANY obligation to any other gay person to be out. That's so self serving it borders on insanity. Guess what the youth today has made it's own mind by itself as always and today statistics up to 65% of teens identify as being Bisexual, Gay, or sympathetic to gay, Bi, or transgendered peoples. Lets not fu** that up by outing others to the point society begins to re-examine their ideas about the gay community.

Most of the straight men I know don't give a crap who's gay or not, and treat gay men as any others so long as that gay man doesn't act overly sexual, and preditory. Many gay men have complained that other gay men are preditory and or can't take NO for an answer. Gay men who are OUT tend to be sexually aggressive and pushy. I also have been subject to gay men who are OUT who tried to convert me from straight to Bisexual or even gay.

Bottom line Gay men need to learn self respect, and compassion towards other gay men who are NOT out.
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Postby Social_Hell » Sat Aug 25, 2007 5:11 pm

furface wrote:Frequently. On more than one occasion bartenders have whispered to me Ya know this is a gay bar, don't ya?

I have not been there LOL but I have had people whisper to me so and so is gay did you know that LOL.

Or people assume I am straight and assume I am anti-gay and make anti-gay remarks to gain me as a friend. This to me is a GOLDEN opportunity!!!

I tell them "" well I am pretty self assured of my sexuality and he won't change who I am, so I don't see him as a threat, and anyways he seems pretty harmless so why should I fear him""

Fear of a gay man hits a straight man right where it hurts, his EGO, and almost instantly theres a response, normally something like " weel I am not afraid I guess you have a point, he seems cool even if he is gay""

Sometimes they repsond "" well I am know I am straight he can't change me either" and then back right off and the conversation dies and so does the accusers attitude.

As straight like gay men or what I like to say normal acting gay men, we can point attitudes in the right direction... Like Gay secret agents LOL.....
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Postby Social_Hell » Sat Aug 25, 2007 5:15 pm

Westwood wrote:Actually in this part of Arkansas, most gay men we know would be mistaken for straight.


Yes in certain areas gay men act ""NORMAL"" lol

What is gay acting anyways? acting like a jerk in public? Ever see a gay men as he grows up, most start normal and eventually become flamers. Its not NORMAL to be loud obnoxious and acting out like a spoiled rich Diva in public, the flamers are the freaks of gay society who feel the NEED to be the gayest of all.

Mirror Mirror on the wall who is the GAYEST man of all?????
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well I have transgressed once again.

Postby Social_Hell » Sat Aug 25, 2007 6:09 pm

The Gay Gods are frowning on me and I will most likely wind up in Gay Hell.

I just went shooting with my HK-91 and M-4 Carbine.

Forgive me for not being gay enough......
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Postby qwertz » Sun Aug 26, 2007 11:29 am

Social_Hell wrote:
qwertz wrote:Almost all gay guys are so str8 in their behaviour no one ever would believe they are gay. They don't act at all. On the contrary. I am not talking about bisexual guys, but about guys attracted to guys only. The image of guys attracted to guys only, as it exists in society, is a total delusion, but society needs it as it makes "outing" necessary and, as long as you have to out yourself, the false image can be maintained there is something fishy about it, while society has the duty to avoid to deform the youth from the very beginning and provide the youth with correct images and not with delusions.



Um WHAT!??

Please give me a break! I have seen so many flamers it's ridiulous, there guys are so out, theirflamer persona arives 15 minutes before they do. Thats the problem, we only see the flamers who have this NEED to out-gay each other. Its not the fault of normal gay men who act with DIGNITY and self respect, its the fault of the Flamers who make society uncomfortable with the 24/7 gay drama. These IDIOTS can't buy a loaf of bread with out a GAY DRAMA incident. They have made society sick of gayness. Because all society see's is GAY Drama queens. This int an arguement for normal men who happen to be gay to be outed, instead its a serious arguement for flamers to quit overacting and creating drama, they are the problem. I am old enough to remember when people didn't give a crap if someone was gay or not, so long as you acted with self respect and Dignity. I lived next door to the Chief of Police who was known to not be gay friendly, we lived on the lake as you know lake lots are tiny so we lived (CLOSE), he had a young 16 year old boy and had no problem with me and my lover who lived ther already 4 years, why??? simple, it was obvious we were mates if you lived that close that long, but me and Rick had dignity, acted like any normal man, and had enough self respect to not be *$#*@# on the docks or backyard, or any other outragious behavior I have personally witnessed by gay men. Discusting displays of gross indecency, not PDA.

Sorry man but you speak in circles. this is your quote maybe say it in english and quit trying to sound lofty and intellectual. I have a IQ of 169 and I can speak regular english and I don't make such a bad attempt at sounding intellectual.
You said..... The image of guys attracted to guys only, as it exists in society, is a total delusion, but society needs it as it makes "outing" necessary and, as long as you have to out yourself, the false image can be maintained there is something fishy about it, while society has the duty to avoid to deform the youth from the very beginning and provide the youth with correct images and not with delusions.......................

Take remedial english again please.

There is and never has been any reason for outing, outing is a self serving act of terrorism. Yes I said TERRORISM! Its a violent act by it's very nature, it places people in dire peril, and many times in financial peril from loss of jobs, and violence form bashers. Anyone who outs someone should face total isolation from self respecting gay men. It is Terrorism. No gay human being has ANY obligation to any other gay person to be out. That's so self serving it borders on insanity. Guess what the youth today has made it's own mind by itself as always and today statistics up to 65% of teens identify as being Bisexual, Gay, or sympathetic to gay, Bi, or transgendered peoples. Lets not fu** that up by outing others to the point society begins to re-examine their ideas about the gay community.

Most of the straight men I know don't give a crap who's gay or not, and treat gay men as any others so long as that gay man doesn't act overly sexual, and preditory. Many gay men have complained that other gay men are preditory and or can't take NO for an answer. Gay men who are OUT tend to be sexually aggressive and pushy. I also have been subject to gay men who are OUT who tried to convert me from straight to Bisexual or even gay.

Bottom line Gay men need to learn self respect, and compassion towards other gay men who are NOT out.


1) You are right my English is rambling. I never learned it. Never learned any in school. I picked it up here and there. English is not my native language and I almost never or even never speak it or have to use it.

2) You think in circles as you want to imprison men in a so called "dignified" male role. That's not the purpose of male liberation or gay liberation. Getting out of that so called "dignified" male role(1) is the purpose, not necessarily in a flamer way, but flamers are a part of it and have as much right to speak as "regular" gay guys. By the way I am one of those "regular" gay guys exactly like you. I never have seen much flamers as you seem to have seen them (most of the guys I know are married with a woman and have children - I know only 2 married gay couples and they are exactly the contrary of flamers), although I sometimes visit Amsterdam and even there you have very few flamers. The only disadvantage of flamers - although they are an extreme small part of the gay community - is they make the "regular" gay guys totally invisible and that's what society wants, although I agree with you "regular" str8 guys don't have any problem with "regular" gay guys.

3) I totally agree with you on outing. In a normal society (where it is assumed you can as well be gay as str8) outing should not be necessary at all, but do we live in a normal society?


(1) I wonder whether that traditional male role is so dignified and especially whether it is at all defensible. I have big doubts about it.
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