Kissing

Discussion on what it means to be straight acting, whether it's good, bad or indifferent.

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Postby Frizzurd » Sat Oct 25, 2008 9:14 pm

How is it a stereotype? Do heteros have a monopoly on the human behavior of affection? I have never even seen a gay couple show public affection. Its not like it makes you out to be a salty whore like some of those pride parade get ups. If heteros do it i think i should to. Yeah you obviously shouldn't do it at some hick diner on the highway or at a rattlesnake round up. (common sense) but If you can't even put your arm around your guy at a mall in a big city then you might as well suck up to the fundamentalists, believe that you are inferior and be thankful your even allowed to live.
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Postby dracuscalico » Sat Oct 25, 2008 11:52 pm

The stereotypes I am talking about are the sissy hedonistic antics that inspire fear instead of trust in the rest of society. The over the top displays of what gay is supposed to mean that actually UNDERMINES the quest for equality. I am not suggesting sucking up to anyone, but just that the extremists calm the f - - k down so the rest of society can see the human side of gay people instead of the histrionics.

When society is getting close to opening it's mind and accepting that gay people are just like anyone else except for who they are attracted to, along come the extremists reinforcing all the negative stereotypes and putting things back at square one.

It SHOULD be possible to walk down the street and behave like other couples. But as long as the negative stereotypical behavior appears to be the norm, it's gonna be a tough road
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Postby furface » Sun Oct 26, 2008 1:10 pm

Here's a really bizarre thought for y'all:

Maybe, just maybe, if more of all y'all non-stereotypical queers would show some moderate affection in public folks might just get the idea. Waiting for the narrow minded and brain dead conservatives to grant us that minimal right in the fullness of time means you're in for a very long wait.

Hug your favorite homo! It's fun!!
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Postby dracuscalico » Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:44 pm

Love the idea IF it is MODERATE...if it's done tastefully by those who have the restraint to know when to stop instead of the ones who have the "I'm gonna shock these straight people" mentality.

I remember going to a gay guy's party, of a mixed but predominately straight crowd of his partner's coworkers, where a girl he invited came there with her new girlfriend, and the whole time, they were extremely DEMONSTRATIVE in hugging, kissing and hanging all over each other, sitting in each others laps, clinging to one another in all kinds of postions.

Even the gay guys there with their own spouses thought it was excessive and could tell they were just doing it for attention, not just because they kept looking at everyone for a reaction that the crowd was too saavy to gratify them with, but because they would do it in the midst of conversations while sitting in a group of people, versus having a private romantic moment off to the side alone.

The thing is, had a pair of males behaved like that, they would have asked them to cool it or leave, but because they were girls everyone just let them be.
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Postby PhillyAgenda » Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:17 pm

I'm all for kissing. But like some others, I wouldn't be too comfortable doing it in public.

I remember waiting for a bus to go home at college. There was this guy (who was a little feminine) waiting for another bus to arrive. The bus he was waiting for came and anther guy hopped off and the two of them embraced and kissed. It was a quick kiss on the lips, nothing spectacular. But I never forgot how the other people who were standing around reacted. Everyone kind of looked at each other, and as the two guys left there was this awkward laughter that just made me uncomfortable.
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Postby olywaguy » Sun Dec 07, 2008 5:01 pm

What about this kind of kissing and what are the ramifications?

Till the day he died, I always kissed my dad on the cheek.

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Postby dracuscalico » Sun Dec 07, 2008 5:20 pm

olywaguy wrote:What about this kind of kissing and what are the ramifications?

Till the day he died, I always kissed my dad on the cheek.

Image


If you're from any of the Latin countries, in any part of the world, (originating with Southern Europeans) it's no big deal. It depends upon the customs of the environment.
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Postby Phoenix6570 » Sun Dec 07, 2008 7:28 pm

As for the type of kissing in that comic I don't think it should be that big of a deal either. The ramifications however would probably cause many issues especially if its like the kind shown in this comic. I could see the child getting teased relentlessly and the same would occur to the father. If it was between a mother and daughter I doubt many would be adverse to such a display. It just goes to show that our society has way to big of an issue with men showing any kind of affection with other men.
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HyperMasculine guys who don't kiss...

Postby Odeh » Sun Dec 07, 2008 7:33 pm

What is this thing about guys who like guys but are NOT into
the gay subculture who will do anything with another guy but don't kiss??..

These seem to be the type of people who are into very masculine things
like football or bodybuilding..and use "gay" as a verb instead of a noun..

For lack of a better description: "Broke back Mountain types"...like one
hyper masculine guy calls me "buddy" and is into bodybuilding and had me over to watch the football game..


The irony is these seem to be the type of guys that the gay subcultlure
guys all want but these guys do not feel comfortable in a typical
gay environment..

They also seem to be the type not to throw you out immediately after
getting it on with you..like they want to sit and talk or watch football..

I notice it seems with alot of gay guys they put you out immediately
after the one night or day stand..just an observation...
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Postby dracuscalico » Sun Dec 07, 2008 8:00 pm

It would seem that to the guys you are describing, the sex is not a big emotional deal like it is for typical gay guys, and I think these types of guys will EVENTUALLY kiss you, but are "saving themselves", as far as that specific action is concerned, because they might consider that the ultimate form of intimacy.

OR....the motto of the story is....DON'T DATE MAINSTREAM GAY GUYS !
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Postby ballsy25 » Sun Dec 14, 2008 4:19 am

i personally dont kiss or hold hands in public. that said, im not opposed at all to others doing it.

the reason i dont do it is not because im "repressed" or unwilling or unable to show my "true feelings." i said that i dont kiss or hold hands, but that doesn't mean i don't show affection. i DO show my affection, but in a masculine way... by horsin' around wit my buddies, laughin, razin 'em, whatever.

just because heterosexual people hold hands and kiss in public does not mean that men should need to. its not a more "true" display of feelings. men have different ways of showing affection for each other, and that can be an honest expression of feeling as well as very sexually exciting! it should be a GOOD thing.
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Postby olywaguy » Fri Jan 16, 2009 11:40 am

Why is it that I can't find a guy that actually likes to kiss. Only my first boyfriend enjoyed kissing. My last one wasn't so crazy about it and now I am seeing someone who is hesitant about it.

Why do some guys really hate to kiss? I mean what is the point of being with someone if you dislike kissing so much?

Very annoying to be sure.
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Postby Phoenix6570 » Fri Jan 16, 2009 11:47 am

I think some guys find kissing to be extremely intimate; much more than sex acts themselves. That being said maybe he's just warming up to you and then can kiss with ease. I agree with your statement though if you hate kissing then there really isn't much of a point to stay with them.
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Postby jkav » Sat Jan 17, 2009 12:31 am

If I've got a good kiss going on, it can be just as exciting to me as any other intimate activity. I find kissing to be, as was stated above, a rather complex emotional and physical activity, which may be why some guys are a little slow to get into it.

I, for one, love it. Just thinking about it gives me the chills.
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Postby masculinity » Sat Jan 17, 2009 3:19 am

dracuscalico wrote:The stereotypes I am talking about are the sissy hedonistic antics that inspire fear instead of trust in the rest of society. The over the top displays of what gay is supposed to mean that actually UNDERMINES the quest for equality. I am not suggesting sucking up to anyone, but just that the extremists calm the f - - k down so the rest of society can see the human side of gay people instead of the histrionics.

When society is getting close to opening it's mind and accepting that gay people are just like anyone else except for who they are attracted to, along come the extremists reinforcing all the negative stereotypes and putting things back at square one.

It SHOULD be possible to walk down the street and behave like other couples. But as long as the negative stereotypical behavior appears to be the norm, it's gonna be a tough road
.

So you're suggesting that gays should strive for acceptance by being what they're not. Good. You're ashamed of the gays and their ways. And, you're saying, "we're different, but we don't want to be treated as different, because we are at least acting straight". What's wrong in people treating you as different when you are different and have a different identity. You think the world is a fool that will adjust itself to the whims and fancies of gays?
Gays are a different species altogether from men (and women). They're not "men who like men," they are "third gender who like men."

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Postby masculinity » Sat Jan 17, 2009 3:24 am

Before Christianity came, there was no male-female kissing... that would have been seen as wierd. Only men kissed men, as social greetings and possibly also as sexual/ romantic gestures in private. But then the West is a Queer world. Men in many non-western cultures still kiss other men as social greetings, but never ever do they kiss women in public. That would be so queer!
Gays are a different species altogether from men (and women). They're not "men who like men," they are "third gender who like men."

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Postby Odeh » Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:01 pm

This kissing thing is largely a cultural issue..I had a Saudi friend once
who would greet me by kissing me on the forehead...

In the United States in most places..when kissing on the mouth in public
is seen..it is assumed the two people involved are in a romantic relation-
ship...In public it is permitted between men and women...In cities like
New York..in the gay areas or tolerant areas men can kiss each other...

But two men kissing in public can still be beaten depending on who sees
them..

Inside gay bars..men can kiss and hold hands in that private public space.

At the annual gay pride parades..the men go over the top with touching and kissing each other in public to make a show...was downtown shopping and they had one and three guys in front of me were kissing and grabbing
each other...

Lots of the rest of the public was staring..one woman raised her top to
expose her very huge breasts and shouted at the guys "$100.00 each fellas!"

THAT was more of a show to me than the guys!!...I was kind of worried
that someone would jump and beat the 3 guys..as the area is generally
conservative not like New York where everyone seems to ignore things.
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